Stickin' {Out Like A Sore Thumb} To Kindness

House of Blues - Houston

A few weeks ago we were getting ready to watch a friend perform at the House of Blues. Greg turned to me and asked, "What do I wear to a Def Leppard/KISS cover band concert? I've got one look - Suburban Dad!" After I stopped laughing, I replied, "We are going to stick out like a sore thumb no matter what we wear, so don't worry about it!"

Feeling out of place is always awkward, but that night, it was really no big deal. We had a blast at the concert, and our friend totally rocked it! Other times, though, that awkward feeling leads to other feelings, like stress and anxiety.

Last weekend, we flew to El Paso and drove north for a short visit to Ruidoso, NM. Izzy loves to fly, but her senses are often in overload at the airport. Her voice gets louder and louder, and her patience is tested. We stick out like a sore thumb. While everyone else is reading and napping, enjoying the calm flight, Izzy is doing just the opposite. Keeping her entertained and distracted is quite a job! We bring lots of coloring books, books, toys, and, of course, our iPads. On this particular flight, we distracted her with taking selfies... lots of selfies!

Airplane Selfie!

While Izzy looks like a typical ten-year-old, she doesn't act like one. Oh, the looks we get sometimes! No, she's not a brat. (Although, sometimes she can really be one!) She's trying to function in a world that doesn't make sense to her, and her response to that is often disruptive behaviors - shouting, crying, whining, moving her arms around... and it's not just the airport; this is an every day battle. We never know when Izz will "freak out" and stick out like a sore thumb. She has come so far, and we refuse to set limitations for her. We will not keep her holed up in the house to avoid "sore thumbness". A trip outside of our home will always be tough for me and Greg, and most of all, tough for Izz. To be honest, I think it makes others more uncomfortable than us. More often than not, though, Izzy makes a new friend or at the very least, makes someone smile on our little adventures.

Another Airplane Selfie! 

I can't count on my fingers and toes the number of times we've had to leave a destination to go back to our hotel room or take a break and head outside. This is our reality. Izzy is learning to cope with her sensory challenges, and she's getting better and better at verbalizing her concerns.

Just before our trip to Ruidoso, Greg got some amazing seats for the Astros game, and we knew that it would be quite an adventure! Izzy shouted for Altuve at every at bat... even when the Blue Jays were batting! We knew to expect a symphony of sounds, so we brought her trusty pink headphones. They did the trick, and Izzy had a blast! Did she stick out by wearing those headphones? Yes. But those headphones were our saving grace! Over the years we've learned a few tricks, and those headphones are one of them. Maybe she sticks out in them, but they help her to deal with the many different sounds.

There will always be times like this when we will feel out of place; this world could be better if we all tried to be more understanding and showed a little more compassion when others feel like this. Remember, the mom and dad who are trying to calm their little girl on the airplane are doing their best. You are getting a tiny snapshot of their every day. Smile. Say something nice.  Be the person who chooses kindness over judgment. Your kindness means so much.

Kindness Cowboy

Beautiful Morning in Ruidoso, NM

Saturday we ate at a place in Ruidoso called Cattle Barons. After waiting for about 45 minutes, we were finally seated, Izzy sandwiched between Greg and Bee Bee (Greg's mom). About 20 minutes into our meal, we noticed a cowboy and his pretty girlfriend; you couldn't help but notice them. He was very loud and kind of obnoxious. After making a few comments about him, we continued on with our dinner. Izzy was getting restless, so I took her out to the car to wait. Bee Bee joined us a few minutes later. About 15 minutes later, Greg and Paw Paw (Greg's dad) came out to the car. Greg said, "You are never going to believe this. That cowboy paid for our entire dinner. He said that we looked like a nice family. He noticed Izzy and wanted to do that for us. He shared that his sister has a similar struggle, and he just notices families like us." Wow. The guy we were talking about paid for our meal. What a humbling moment! For the rest of the night we sat in awe of the kindness of this man, which also came alongside reflection on ourselves. Why did we feel the need to talk about this guy and point out his loud behaviors? We had no idea who this guy was and were so quick to talk about him. 

I had already started drafting this blog post when this happened. How ironic! This was a perfect reminder to me that we are ALL fighting tough battles. While it was just a few trite comments, still I am clearly struggling with talking about others. Also, the battles of others aren't always evident; he had a similar situation in his life The man could see that Izzy needed lots of reminders and help throughout our dinner and his gesture was just so kind. However, he may never know just how greatly he impacted me, Greg, Bee Bee, and Paw Paw. Before I can ask others to please be compassionate toward us, I must first show that same compassion to others. I vow to make a conscious effort to do just that. When tempted to talk about another, I'm going to make sure it's something positive. I'm going to stick to kindness. Thank you, cowboy, for teaching us that lesson!

Now I've got to go filter through the hundreds of pics Izzy took on her iPod. I'm sure they're all post-worthy... yeah, whatever!

So many pics of the airplane's wings on Izzy's iPod - LOL!